This letter was written to our friends from St. Louis Family Church (SLFC) pastored by Jeff & Patsy Perry.

August 25, 1999

Dear Friend,

            It has come to my attention that there are some of our friends from St. Louis Family Church (SLFC) who, because we have pioneered a church in North County that was not ‘approved’ of by our pastor have come to the conclusion that we may be acting out of rebellion.  This conclusion was made most times without our friends coming to us and asking questions to get to know our heart.  So as my friend, I am asking you to read this letter so that if you still come to the same conclusion, then at least you are making a decision based on knowledge and not just following one man’s opinion. 

            The decision to start a church in North County was not an easy one, nor was it one that we came to overnight.  Actually, we had been seeking God since the beginning of 1998 when we felt it was time to step out into the ministry again. In the spring of 1998, Paul met with Pastor Jeff to let him know how we were feeling.  We then started seeking God about the location for the church that we have known that we should pioneer in the States since we came back from the mission field in 1994. 

            We visited several cities last year – Dallas, Colorado Springs, Los Angeles, Houston, Memphis, Indianapolis, San Diego, Nashville….and the list goes on.  Not including those that Paul visited on his own such as Seattle, Philadelphia, Huntsville, San Jose, etc.  There were still even more requests for us to start a church from other states and from other parts of the world to consider.  We bought a brand new van in March of 1998 and by the end of that same year it had 50,000+ miles on it.  So as you can see, this decision was not one we took lightly.  Most times, all we had to do was spend a short amount of time to know that the city we were visiting was not the one where God wanted us.  Our hearts always came back to St. Louis and to the North County area. 

            North County is where Paul grew up and where we lived after we got married until we left for the mission field in 1990.  Our family remained here, so when we came for visits – North County is where we stayed.  As young people, we spent much time evangelizing in North County.  We often talked about pioneering in North County.  In fact, many of you may remember our home meetings and prayer meetings in the mid 80’s.  North County is our home.  North County is our Jerusalem.  It made complete sense when Paul came to me in early November of 1998 and told me that North County is where we were suppose to start the church.  In fact, I already knew – but sadly, I also knew what the consequences might be and my fears proved to be true. 

            Paul met with Pastor Jeff to discuss these issues and was counseled that it was ‘not the right time’ for us to pioneer a church in North County. 

            Please, understand that Pastor Jeff has been in a pastoral role over Paul for 18 years and myself for 15 years.  There has never been a time that he has asked us to pray about something that we did not take it to heart and do exactly that, this time was no exception.  We went back and sought God about North County, after much prayer, we knew what God wanted and made steps toward that goal.  Each step of the way we continued to pray and would have pulled back at any indication FROM GOD that this was not the right time.  We then met with Pastor Jeff one last time to inform him of our decision and proceeded with obedience to God. 

            Since then, we have been labeled as being rebellious and out of God’s will.  Of which, we are neither.  We are completely submitted to God.  And let me assure you that we are not out of God’s will.  1 Timothy 2:5 says, “For there is one God and one Mediator between God and men, the Man Christ Jesus.”  We do believe in submission to those in authority over us.  We are to love them, honor them, respect them, pray for them, seek their counsel, and follow their godly example.  But when it comes to decisions about our lives – that is between God and us.  We don’t need someone else to hear from God for us.  We have a Great High Priest and can go boldly to the throne ourselves (Hebrews 4:14-16).  Letting another man make decisions for our lives would give him the place that only God deserves.  Let me make it clear that if we are rebelling in any way, it is not to God but to a man.  Our lives belong completely to God. 

            We have been shunned like unrepentant sinners.  We have NOT sinned.  Not in God’s eyes.  We are simply obeying the Word and preaching the gospel to those who need it.  I am your sister and Paul is your brother, yet we are treated like the plague.  Most (not all) of our friends have left us, our ministry and our lives put to scrutiny by not only totally strangers, but also by those whom who have considered friends, and all because of one man’s opinion.  We are not the first that this has happened to (in fact, many of the others were also your close friends), but our prayer is that by standing up to such preposterous thinking, we will hopefully be the last. 

            1 Timothy 3:1 say, “Here is a trustworthy saying: If anyone sets his heart on being an overseer, he desires a noble task.”  And in Philippians 4:8 we are told, “….whatever things are noble….meditate on these things.”  But lets go on in 1 Timothy 3:2-7, “Now the overseer must be above reproach, the husband of but one wife, temperate, self-controlled, respectable, hospitable, able to teach, not given to drunkenness, not violent but gentle, not quarrelsome, not a lover of money.  He must manage his own family well and see that his children obey him with proper respect. (If anyone does not know how to manage his own family, how can he take care of God’s church?)  He must not be a recent convert, or he may become conceited and fall under the same judgment as the devil.  He must also have a good reputation with outsiders, so that he will not fall into disgrace and into the devil’s trap.”  Not only does my husband meet all of these requirements, but excels in most.  Anyone who knows my husband at all can attest to this. 

            There has been the question, why doesn’t Paul and Pastor Jeff get together and work this thing out?  Since the last meeting with Pastor Jeff, Paul has sent numerous letters, e-mails, faxes and phone calls requesting an appointment (which we did get once on a spur of the moment kind of thing and couldn’t make it).  In other words, we have tried over and over to reconcile this division in the body of Christ according to the Word of God.  However, we have received nothing but silence in return.  Anyone wanting a copy of the letters or e-mails sent need only to ask and we will send you copies, also, anyone desiring any letter that we sent to friends to inform them of our meeting or e-mails sent to a general e-mail list can get a copy of your own and make your own conclusions based on knowledge and not gossip.  The basic gist of all of the letters written to Pastor Jeff were as follows – “we don’t understand why,” “this is how we are interpreting things that you have said – please explain what your heart was,” “it really hurts to be treated like this – please respond.”  Paul may have sounded like a child crying out for his fathers attention…..maybe that is what it was (we still look at him as our spiritual father), but why has the father not responded?  Some have told us it is because Pastor Jeff feels some of the things that he told us were misinterpreted, O.K., but we have asked for clarification over and over.  Others have said he feels that by responding it might give us the sense that he condones our decision to pioneer this church.  Where is that line of thinking in the Word?  I see no Scripture to back up and idea of pushing someone away instead of clarifying yourself and proving your stance in the Word of God.  On the contrary, we are charged to NOT have divisions, and Matthew 18 tells us that we are to go to a brother who has offended us and address the situation – we have not been given the opportunity to address this issue with Pastor Jeff.  Notice that I refer to what others have told us that the Pastor and his wife have said, we can’t know their hearts if we never have the opportunity to talk with them ourselves.

             Satan can only use situations like this to divide us.  This division is not from God – He does not want us divided.  This division has led to sin in God’s people.  Some are slandering, others gossiping, others judging and still others lying…..and some of these people don’t even know us!!!  On top of that, it has been said that my past mistakes and sins have been brought up as a reason to discredit our ministry.  It is not secret that in 1996 I backslid and walked away from God.  While backslidden, I made a lot of bad decisions and sinned against my God, my husband and my family.  However, God in his goodness brought me back, cleansed me from all unrighteousness and restored me.  Some of you saw that miraculous restoration process.  God truly used Pastor Jeff to demonstrate His love and His mercy toward me during this time.  But to bring up my past sins not only breaches a trust given, but more than that, makes a mockery of the blood that Jesus shed to cover them.

             The apostle Paul addresses division in the body of Christ in 1 Corinthians.  He addresses the church in Corinth by telling them that he could not speak to them as spiritual, but as to babes in Christ and carnal.  1 Cor. 3:3 says, “for you are still carnal, for where there are envy, strife, and divisions among you, are you not carnal and behaving like mere men?  For when one says, ‘I am of Paul’ and another, ‘I am of Apollos,’ are you not carnal?  Who then is Paul, and who is Apollos, but ministers through whom you believed, as the Lord gave each one.  I planted, Apollos watered, but God gave the increase.  So then neither he who plants is anything, nor he who waters, but God who gives the increase.  (vs 9)  For we are God’s fellow workers; you are God’s field, you are God’s building.”  Verse 11 warns against those who lay another foundation – we are not laying another doctrinal foundation.  We are preaching the same gospel that was preached to us.  Verses 18-20 says that if we think that we are wise we deceive ourselves – wise about what?  Boasting in men. (v21)  “Therefore let no one boast in men.  For all things are yours; whether Paul or Apollos or Cephas, or the world or life or death, or things present or things to come – all are yours.  And you are Christ’s, and Christ is God’s.”  Our loyalties should not be to a man or to an organization but to God alone.  It is times that we grew up and put a stop to politics in the church and the immaturity of divisions so that we can preach the gospel with a clear conscience towards our brothers and sisters in the Lord.

             The great commission (Matt. 28:19 & Mark 16:15) tells us to go and make disciples!  Acts 1:8 says, “…. And you shall be witnesses of me in Jerusalem, and in all Judea and Samaria, and to the end of the earth.”  Paul and I have gone to our Judea and to our Samaria and to the ends of the earth.  We are now called to our Jerusalem.  Is it so incredulous to believe that God would call a couple from North County back to North County to start a church?  Not only is it credible, but as you can see from the Word of God – it is a direct command. 

            Paul was born in the mission field.  Grew up in the ministry with his mother and father (please find an enclosed paper with details about Paul’s dad and the heritage that we have learned from his parents obedience and faithfulness – Paul’s dad is still being honored for his work for God even though he went on the be with the Lord over 7 years ago).  Paul served faithfully under his Pastor’s ministry for years.  He has preached the gospel throughout the states, served as a missionary to 3 foreign countries, pastored an awesome church in Panama for the U.S. Military stationed there, graduated from Rhema Bible Training Center with a 4.0 GPA.  After Rhema, came and again submitted to his Pastor’s leadership (during my restoration process) without thinking twice about ushering and serving in any small capacity that need to be filled.  Anyone who has known Paul for any amount of time can attest to the fact that he is no a rebellious man.  He is kind, gentle, and forgiving.  Through all this, he still bears no ill will towards anyone.  He has had the call of God on his life from a young age – that his friends can attest to.  So why is it that his Christian friends can so easily abandon him when he sets out to fulfill that call?  I have seen others who have gone through this same horrifying experience – my question is why?  Because of a man’s opinion?  Where are the morals?  Where is the faithfulness to our friends? 

            The apostle Paul tells us how to combat division in the church in 1 Cor. 13 “Though I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I have become sounding brass or a clanging cymbal. And though I have the gift of prophecy, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and though I have all faith, so that I could remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. And though I bestow all my goods to feed the poor, and though I give my body to be burned, but have not love, it profits me nothing. Love suffers long and is kind; love does not envy; love does not parade itself, is not puffed up; does not behave rudely, does not seek its own, is not provoked, thinks no evil; does not rejoice in iniquity, but rejoices in the truth; bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.
Love never fails.” The apostle’s charge is simple.  Jesus sums it up when he said the second greatest commandment is to love our neighbor as ourselves (Matt. 22:39).  He also said in John 13:35, “By this all men will know that your are my disciples, if you have love for one another.”  I believe that Jesus’ definition of love would not be the love that Paul, myself, and countless others of your friends have received.  I think that the psycho-babble ideas of keeping people at arms length is in direct opposition to the whole Word of God and the examples given to us therein.  I believe that to bow to another man’s opinion on a matter instead of going to the Word is putting that man in the position of God.  As the Church of God we need to pray for the courage to stand up to injustice when we see it, seek direction for our lives from God and not man, and choose to be Christ-like regardless of political or peer pressure.  Acts 5:29, “But Peter and the other apostles answered and said: “We ought to obey God rather than man.”  We answer the same. 

            Now that I have had a chance to share my heart, I hope that you can make you own assessment of our ‘attitude’ when starting this church (and now as well) and whether or not we are out of GOD’S will for our lives with a little more knowledge.  But let me share one more portion of Scripture with you, going back to 1 Corinthians again, this time chapter 4, “Let a man so consider us, as servants of Christ and stewards of the mysteries of God.  Moreover, it is required in stewards that one be found faithful.  But with me it is a very small thing that I should be judged by you or by a human court.  In fact, I do not even judge myself.  For I know of nothing against myself, yet I am not justified by this; but He who judges me is the Lord.  Therefore, judge nothing before the time, until the Lord comes, who will both bring to light the hidden things of darkness and reveal the counsels of the hearts. Then each one’s praise will come from God.”

            This letter was written with full permission from my husband and was sent not only to friends but to anyone that it has been reported as being affected by these issues.  So if you are wondering if someone you know received this letter – if they fell into these categories and I had their address, then they probably did receive a letter.  I am writing this with a clear conscience, standing on the Word of God (which is quoted throughout this letter) and have nothing to hide.  My request is that as children of the Most High God, nothing be taken out of context in this letter (it hurts to even have to say that).  There are no hidden motives or secret messages.  I have been completely open about my feelings.  

            As I have already stated, we have tried to address these issues on a more personal basis for months to no avail, however with people still being affected by these issues, we must not only address this division but also completely deal with it according to the Word of God.  My heart is not to cause trouble with this letter, but to put an end to the trouble that already exists.  This is not a time to be complacent, to desire no involvement, or to ignore the situation at hand.  We are part of your family and we need your love to help deal with this issue.

With All My Love (referring to 1 Cor. 13) In The Lord,

Stella

P.S.  Please feel free to call me anytime, I would love to be able to talk to my friends again.